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Posts Tagged ‘learning’

I feel like my whole life is about choices.  I guess I feel that way because it’s true.  My life is all about choices.  Somedays, I don’t want to make any choices, and somedays, I just want to make every choice possible.  Some days I fear I make some really awful choices, and somedays, I make very wise choices.

Just a random note…of a very obvious thing.

I am just wondering if we truly get to choose who we will love.  I currently am feeling trapped by this predicament.  I don’t know if this particular person will ever leave my mind, and at the same time, I am thinking about another person going through something similar.  Tonight, he had a very difficult decision to make about the continuance of a relationship or not.  The obstacles were too great, he believes, to make the relationship truly work for both of them.  I know that the chick-flick experts would say that the relationship must be fought over, however, I would agree that this person needed to be realistic about both of their futures.  He truly is having a difficult night and I am sad for him, but he is doing what is best.

As for me, I don’t wish to dwell in my particular torment, however, this is my challenge and my adventure to go through with the Lord.  I now get to have in-depth conversations with Him about where my heart really is.  Is it with Him, or is it with him?  Sometimes I hate my mind, but I’m still around because it is supposed to do something for God.  I hope He gives me an extra measure of patience and understanding with this one, because I’m going to need it.

Time to close my eyes, but not without a verse:

“You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. For ‘in just a little while, He who is coming will come and not delay’.” (Hebrews 10:36-37)

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I am learning so much about love this month.  I learning about how difficult it is, how beautiful it is, how wonderful it is, and how painful it can be.  I kind of want to pool the group reading this blog to ask how it is that they are able to continuing loving people with God’s love.

I almost forgot to blog today because I have been scheduling my days so tightly.  I normally blog in the early morning, however, I wanted a morning off to watch a tv show and sleep in a little bit.  I have found my own spirit a little less-driven to read His word and pray, however, I can almost feel the prayers of those who are thinking of and praying for me daily; I’ve felt it since I left my house on Monday morning. That’s love for the Lord and dedication to His kingdom.  For those of you who have been praying for me and thinking of me, thank you, I really have felt you.

This will be a short post, but I have a free evening this evening to go over some things and so I hope to have something more put together for tomorrow.

Love and Light.

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