Posts Tagged ‘Truth’


Over the past decade, I have sometimes forgotten who I am.  I really don’t know if I am at home with the person that I did become.  Did I become someone that I really wanted to be, or did I compare myself with someone else in order to become like another person?  Who is the real me, anyways?

Over the past few months, I have definitely had some ups and downs; I have been able to easily see who I am in a sense, and, in a sense, of who I am not.  I have been able to say ‘no’ to some things that I know will not benefit me in the long run, and closeout the relationships that hurt me.  I guess in essence, this blog would have to be the example of how to love oneself.  I really don’t have any solid advice about how to go about getting there 100%, however, I have some thoughts….of course:


If you have figured out what you like to do (that is something you can make a living off of), I think that you should start to pursue that as a goal.  It has taken me most of my adult life to become cognizant of the things that I enjoy doing and would like to continue to do, but it has caused me to start in a direction toward a goal.  In that, I feel like I am able to have a face, to have a reason for existence (for lack of a better description).  In that, in a sense, I can face my next task, my next hurdle, knowing that I am heading down a track/road that isn’t necessarily easy, but I am content in, knowing that’s for a certain purpose.  All of that, leads to a sense of having a little bit of a “chin-up” moment; a moment when you realize that you like what you are doing, and therefore can push yourself knowing you can love who you are while working towards that goal.

There are a lot of bad voices out there; too many to really name specifically, however, they say sometimes that you aren’t good enough to do what you want, or be who you want to be.  Sometimes, the voices say that the world is better off without you in it.  I can tell you that these things are not true, that your life most definitely has value; the people around you really don’t want to lose you, but, YOU have to make that decision of belief for yourself.  These voices can stay with you hours, days, weeks, months, years after you have originally heard them.  I think sometimes I have stayed so busy in an attempt to block them out.  That could be true, however, the people that have stayed around me, have had to constantly tell me that they enjoy spending that time with me; that I’m loved.  I’m still here, haven’t left town or the people that I love, so I guess it’s me deciding that I do indeed trust and believe what my loved ones are saying.  It’s up to each person to decide if they desire to trust.  For the parties getting the negative vibes, etc.:  do you really trust your friends and family when they say that they love you?  Sometimes that is the key to being able to stay in a town, stay in a lifestyle, or staying alive.

To come to a conclusion of sorts, friends, what you say to others and how they respond to you is very important.  You are helping each of your friends and family members determine how they feel about themselves; you’re letting them know they are worth the time and effort to know; that they can be loved.  As much as I’ve absorbed over these last 33 years, the one thing I’ve taken closest to heart is the people in my life that haven’t changed how they feel about me and the life path that the Lord has chosen for me.  Those people are sometimes are the reason why I love myself and what I do.

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OK – just to get the answers out of the way, in case you read yesterday’s post, here are the movies:

  • Bend It Like Beckham
  • Big Trouble in Little China
  • Pride and Prejudice, or, Bride and Prejudice
  • Camelot (Richard Harris version)
  • Catch & Release
  • Down with Love
  • The Holiday
  • New Years Eve
  • Maid in Manhattan
  • Penelope
  • Sabrina
  • She’s the Man
  • Something New

How many did you nail!?  Good job whatever you got; everyone’s a winner 😉

I have been struggling to think of what part of love to talk about today.  No, I don’t think that I reached the end of love, I just didn’t know which topic to choose.

My favorite type of love is unconditional.  I think there are songs and statements about unconditional love, however, I really don’t think that we’ll ever be able to fully understand the concept of unconditional love, because, none of us are capable of it.

To me, only someone perfect could look at everything that we have ever done, currently doing, or will do, and still say at the end of it all that they still love us and that the love that they have for us had not been altered by anything.  While I know that some would profess to say that they are capable of it, we are beings that can easily be affected by the outside forces that can dictate how we internally process things.  I think that as much as we want to love unconditionally, we actually are incapable of loving someone as consistently as they need.  The obvious example would be that of betrayal.  A bold betrayal in the face of trust.  Someone whom you trust implicitly with your life (perhaps) and your happiness, and they in turn do something that makes you mistrust them.  Your FEELINGS for that person shift, which cause you to have an emotional shift, and a doubt of your love and affection for that person since they have challenged your patience and crossed a line.  You cannot state that your love for that person isn’t altered, because it is.  They have done something to you, that some would deem unforgivable, causing your sense of reality with regard to your relationship with them to falter.

This post is meant to express the need for a higher authority being involved in loving others.  We cannot love one another perfectly, however, there is One who can, and He has been doing so since the creation of the world.  I’m very grateful that He goes before me when it comes to having relationships with friends and family because there are so many things that I have done so incorrectly in loving people around me, however, He takes care of expressing the correct things for me when I fail.  I find hope in this post because the truth in love doesn’t rest solely upon me, but His power of unconditional love that will never fail or forsake us.

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I kept wondering for a bit why that ‘Sons and Daughters’ now ‘Watermark’ song kept coming into my head.  As I was going through things today, I realized that I had left God out of my decisions to do a few things today.  As I looked at that beautiful sunset this evening, I realized that I was hopeless, helpless, faltering, and flat out wrong without Him.  So — as I cozy up to my favorite pillows in bed tonight, approaching His throne and laying my head on His huge chest and crying myself to sleep (but in a good way), I remember and share this song….

          Well it’s bitter cold December and the leaves have fallen true
          And I do believe I’m still in love with You
          Yeah my scenery keeps changin’ and sometimes it’s hard to view
          but You let me see so much since I’ve known You
          So I headed to what seemed like nowhere
          But You told me You’d come
          You told me You’d meet me here
          And You were here to say:

         Welcome to Delaware, I know you’ve traveled far
         And it’s a lot colder here than you’re used to
         And I know, that in the winter time things aren’t what they used to be
         So all you really have here now is Me!

          So I settled here and that is that 
          For You to show me who I am
          You had to take me to a place I’d never been
          And all the things I dreaded most, about the things unseen
          Have now become the sweetest part of me

         Though I headed to what seemed like nowhere
          I knew You would come, I knew You would meet me here
          And You were here to say…

          Welcome to Delaware, I know you’ve traveled far
          And it’s a lot colder here than what you’re used to
          And I know, that in the winter time, things aren’t what they used to be
          So all you really have here now, is Me!

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